May 2013
airagorn:
dumb story because i think i’m funny
we were watching a movie in school and there was a scene where this guy was driving over lava and they kept showing close up shots of the tires catching on fire and i started laughing and my friend kept asking me what was so funny and when i finally composed myself i took a deep breathe and whispered
‘hot wheels’
1 tag
538rqaeb98gh434398jvgi:
people who do math homework in pen are fearless
callmekitto:
internetfeet:
People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t
Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here”
And menstuation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone”
THIS EXPLAINS THE DIFFERENCE 40x BETTER THAN MY ENTIRE SEVENTH GRADE SEX ED CLASS.
tupacabra:
one time i looked at something that had glitter on it and it got on my hands somehow
dispopular:
*looks through your selfies*
peasantbutts:
if google isn’t your search engine i don’t trust you
twelvedaysofdestiel:
‘jesus, you’re tight,’ i say as i try to cram another goddamn book onto my bookshelf
yeahitsmarco:
*phone vibrates while sitting on it*
spookymormon:
please stop asking me about my future ill cry
yorshs:
“i need to find a tutorial for something.”
“i know, i’ll look on youtube!”
exasperated sigh
airagorn:
dumb story because i think i’m funny
we were watching a movie in school and there was a scene where this guy was driving over lava and they kept showing close up shots of the tires catching on fire and i started laughing and my friend kept asking me what was so funny and when i finally composed myself i took a deep breathe and whispered
‘hot wheels’
toidarian:
i’m starting to reach that point of scifi inebriation again where the thought that i’m actually confined to a single planet is really weird to me
googlehomie:
you’re gonna regret not dating me after I get hot
dickfaerie:
adding a period on the end of everything makes it sound sarcastic
lol.
haha.
youre so funny.
youre so hot.
of course i dont hate you.
harryedward:
i’m friends with everyone until they get better friends and kinda leave me
1 tag
dignitea:
I’m stuck between wanting to be an adult, accomplishing a lot, and contributing a lot to society and lying on my floor, ignoring my responsibilities, and crying to sad songs alone in my room.
hungarian:
tumblr has desensitized me to humor like i used to laugh at a lot more things but now everything seems old & i feel like i’m 57 yrs old
abomasnow:
do she got the booty?
she don’t
frenchsfries:
things to look forward to in the summer
shirtless boy
sHirTlEsS bOys
sHIRTLESS BOYFS
SHIRTELSL EBOYS
no school
1 tag
morristibbs:
IF SOMEONE IS SCARED OF SPIDERS OR BUGS DONT FUCKING PICK ONE UP AND WALK TOWARDS THEM WITH IT YOU ARENT FUCKING FUNNY YOU’RE A GODDAMN ASSHOLE
mishaoverlord:
the-fandoms-are-cool:
how I discovered I was pansexual
shit that guy’s hot
oh fuck that girl’s hot too
wait what trans people are hot as well
damn sweet jesus I’m not sure what gender you are but you’re very hot
is there a term for this condition
osamah:
nothing screws up your friday like realizing it’s only wednesday
clamperl:
clamperl:
I HAVE A TEST TOMORROW AND I LOST THE NOTES
1 tag
cryonetics:
snorlaxatives:
*sexually strokes wall until finding light switch*
What a turn on.
mskneesocks:
you’re the only one who understands me google
really tho the fictional character that’s been treated the worst by its writers is Scrat
Watch
irresponsibleeyouth:
The trick is to not let people know how really weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.
bandbutts:
If masturbating while stoned isn’t called weed whacking I don’t know how to live my life anymore
strawberrydaydreams:
do you ever hate someone so much but you don’t even have a valid reason
you’re just like
no
gameboycoloured:
u know my url not my html
littlestbug:
poutingly:
angryfuckingvegan:
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Milk is not natural.
Angryfuckingvegan comes the conclusion that cows are not real and milk does not actually exist
i’m imagining him alone in his...
1 tag
gif:
i love u i hate u touch me dont look at me
1 tag
catpun:
PEOPLE WHO THINK YOUR GRADES REFLECT YOUR INTELLIGENCE
hikkomijian:
imagine guinea pigs
undomesticated
hunting
in packs
2 tags
fartgallery:
if I start blushing and you yell “awww you’re embarrassed!!!!!” I will never speak to you ever again
